F.U.S.L.

This may read as a rant, but it isn’t.  Its an observation that has been gnawing at me for months.

Why do females, and males, feel the need to couple in Second Life?  The metaverse is gateway to a fantastical realm where you can be and do anything you want!  Its utopia with a soundtrack.  And yet, so many of you feel this sick compulsion to enter into Second Life, and make it as miserable as the reality you’re trying to escape for a scant few hours.  You take a virtual world of possibilities and boundless exploration, and turn it into a fucking Jerry Springer montage of cyber sex, lies, and video/text capture.  Why?  Could it really, truly, and actually be that you enjoy being miserable?  Is that your fantasy?  To come home from hours of long, hard work (sans any positive praise), and log into a world that you virtually control, and make it just as boring, ridiculous, and festering with negativity?

Why do women run after men who log in solely to see how many silly women then can cyber fuck, toy with, partner, unpartner, and control?  Does that really sum up the perfect pixilated man for you?  And men  … why do you always make it a point to pursue the big tit blondes who work as strippers and sometimes escort?  Is it really that thrilling a hunt to stick your carefully crafted prim wank into an imaginary hole that has been charted and claimed on many a map?  And you’re genuinely surprised when she breaks the partnership to go and play second-slave to a Gorean?

Why are you RL-married players partnered in Second Life?  Why are you reciting the same vows you took in RL to your flesh and blood spouses, to an avatar?  Do you really know this person you claim to love?  Do you realize anonymity plays a huge part in cyber love?  Do you realize that photo they claim to be the ‘real’ them could very well be a cute friend or the supposed RL photos sent to them from some other cyber lover?  Do you realize you’re in love with a concept?  More importantly, do you realize emotional adultery isn’t any different than if that really were his penis in you RL?  My guess is you probably just don’t care.  Which is fine, its your world.  Enjoy it.  But honestly, don’t be surprised when the courts declare cyber adultery as an acceptable grounds for divorce.  Yes, that’s right, no more playing with your cyber beau while the hubby’s at work.  You’re going to get a job to support yourself, and I don’t mean at a virtual strip club.  Is the fantasy really that good? Or are you confusing fantasy and reality?

Why do women who are a perfectly sane and competent become asinine when faced with a manwhore wearing the latest ‘Brad Pitt’ skin?  It doesn’t matter that he’s partnered to the lead dancer (ahem, stripper) at the club, he loves you. He said so in i/m.  So what if his profile pick states that she’s the only one for him.  He sat with you twice on the Lovescene ball.

Why are these men attractive?  Because honestly, after reading their profile and carrying on a conversation with these ‘Adonis’ of Second Life, I feel like scrubbing my brain and monitor with disinfectant.  Sure, he’s ‘pretty’, but he’s about as interesting as a prim.  Actually not even that.  A prim can be scripted to spout semi-interesting observations. 

The same applies to males.  Why is that bad-bodied diva with fugly flexi hair so hard to resist?  Are you drawn to her face lighting like a moth to the flame?  What in the hell is going on in Second Life?  Is this really our collective fantasy?  Are we really this sad?

Where the fuck are the roleplayers?  Have they signed up for a free membership to real life and left me on my lonesome?  Will someone please send me a group invite?! TP NOW!

This is completely off the subject, but I feel its just as important.  To you ladies who seem to take pride in labeling yourselves a ‘bitch’ in profiles and tags … why don’t you answer me when I call you in open chat?!  Why do you get angry when I call you a bitch?  You said you were a bitch, I was being polite!

Gah … bitch.